I had a road rage incident happen to me this week – My initial reaction was to be rude back, but then I thought: Why should I allow someone else’s anger to be passed on to me? As I drove off, I promptly waved and blew him a kiss – Have some of that, I thought and I laughed so hard… As I glanced over he seemed even more furious. Then I thought, hmmm what a great subject this would be for this weeks post … Every cloud…
I pondered on just how many people there are walking around this planet angry and aggressive. It has a profound effect on their health, relationships, quality of life and the happiness of others. And an awful way to live.
Here is an example of how anger can be stored: Let’s say you have had an argument or a bad experience with a friend or family member which left you feeling aggrieved. You walk away from the situation upset and you can’t stop thinking about it. You continue to dwell on it for days, weeks and sometimes years. You don’t speak to that person anymore and your anger turns into hatred. The mere mention of that person’s name or something that reminds you of them brings a flood of emotion back to the surface, and the hurt and upset returns. Now, if that person had of apologised saying how sorry they were and asked for forgiveness you would in most instances recover. You may not be totally happy but when you accept the situation and forgive and justify, you gain closure.
For those people carrying anger, bitterness or resentment around with them, the good news is there is a way to shift it, even if it is deep routed from many years ago and there is no chance of an apology or justification from the perpetrator.
Firstly know this, there is always a learning in every negative event and something positive will have happened as a result of it, regardless of how bad it was.
We must gain closure to be able to move on and live more peacefully. Here’s how to do it!
Find a quiet space and sit comfortably. Now, Imagine yourself, looking down on yourself from above. While watching yourself, replay the incident that has caused the anguish in your mind. Whilst doing this, rub the sides of your arms from the shoulder to the elbow in an up and down motion –keep this going throughout.
Then ask yourself what it was you learned about the event, no matter how trivial, find the learning, and when you have, say out loud to yourself – Thank you for the learning and I release this experience with love.
You should do this individually for every situation that you can remember that makes you feel upset or angry whenever you think about it. It doesn’t matter if it was 3 hours ago or 30 years ago. You may want to repeat this daily for a while if it’s really deep routed.
Work on this and you will develop an amazing sense of inner peace and better relationships with yourself as well as others.
This week’s quote: When seeking revenge or projecting your anger, bitterness, and resentment towards others – Dig two graves – One for yourself.